No one can give time and energy to every cause, good though it may be. No one can possibly enter every single battle, let alone win them all. As noble a goal as it is, no one person is going to be able to help right every wrong. It's important, then, for us to discern in which causes and battles we should be engaged.
A story in the Old Testament can give us some instruction. (II Samuel 2:18-23) Joab, Abishai, and Asahel were King David's nephews, sons of his sister Zeruiah. All three were engaged in the war being fought against the house of Saul. Asahel was known for being an especially swift runner; he was like a gazelle. Fueled by anger or pride, he began chasing Abner, the commander of Saul's forces. What a trophy this would be to take back to his fellow soldiers: Abner, either dead or alive! He might be credited with winning the war, securing the kingdom for David, practically single-handed! Although Asahel was one of David's special group of thirty "mighty men," his fighting skill was undoubtedly less than that of the experienced soldier he was pursuing. Along the way, he paid no attention to opportunities to take other prisoners; his eyes were on Abner only. He chased after the officer relentlessly, not stopping for anything.
Abner looked back and saw someone coming after him. He called out, "Is that you, Asahel?"
"Yes, it is!"
"Go fight someone else!" Abner warned. "Take on one of the younger men to your right or left and strip him of his weapons." Knowing the young soldier was no match for his own experience, he offered an alternate action of safety and honor. He did not ask the young man to disgrace himself by dropping his pursuit entirely, but only to take on a cause more suited to his strength. It would appear to anyone watching that he had chased some other person, not Abner himself.
Asahel perhaps thought Abner's suggestion was made from fear, as they were now close enough to call back and forth to one another. This may even have fired his determination to disarm the general and take him prisoner, or else to kill him in hand-to-hand combat. Asahel continued his chase.
Abner shouted to him again. "Get away from here!" he begged. "I don't want to kill you! Don't make me do that! How could I face your brother Joab again?" Whether he respected Joab or feared him, he did not want to anger him. If Asahel did not turn aside, Abner would have to kill or be killed.
Asahel refused to turn back, and Abner thrust backward with the butt end of his spear, a move so powerful that the spear was driven all the way through the young soldier's body. He stumbled to the ground and died on the spot. Everyone that came by stopped and stood still when they saw Asahel, the ambitious young soldier lying there.
He was brave. He was determined. He was fighting a noble cause. And he was dead.
It is poor strategy for us to take on causes just because we are eager to do so. Fighting battles just to show our strength or ability—like who is "boss" here or who is "right"—are seldom effective in the long run. A "death-blow" can come from the direction we least expect it if we engage in conflict that we were not meant to enter.
When facing their enemies, kings and commanders in the Scripture would ask of the Lord, "Shall we enter the battle?" And God would tell them that they should and He would give victory, or He would tell then not to for they would meet with defeat. We are confronted on all sides with issues: family relationships, church decisions, community actions, political questions, social problems. We cannot possibly be involved in all of them. God will help us to choose the battles where we will be most effective for the cause of Christ, and to have a clear conscience concerning the rest.
Marjorie
Monday, June 29, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
Denial: Not Just a River in Egypt
"Don't be such a crybaby," a sibling teases.
(Sobbing) I'm not a crybaby!
My oatmeal tastes nasty.
"It's not nasty. Eat it," the parent warns.
"You'll hardly feel it," the doctor says.
Oww-oww—before the shot, oww-oww-oww—afterwards.
Some of us learned early that our emotions and sensory experiences were not acceptable to those around us. We learned that, by all indications, they cannot be trusted.
We were wrong.
So now we say, "Problem? There's not a problem," to avoid a confrontation.
I am so mad I could spit nails.
"Of course I'll help with your garage sale," we agree.
I really don't want to. Why did I say "yes"?
"It's okay. I don't mind," as friend or family member oversteps the boundary. I guess I've got to be okay with this if I want to be a good daughter / wife / mother / Christian.
And we are still wrong. We are keeping stuffed deep inside ourselves our feelings, our opinions, our instincts. This makes us, to some degree, inauthentic in our interaction with others. More dangerously, however, it creates a duplicity in our own thinking. Eventually, this will either erupt in anger and open damage to our relationships, or it will blunt our perception and cause us to abandon our personal selves. We tell ourselves over and over again, "This doesn't really matter," when it does matter, or "I shouldn't let this bother me," when it would bother any reasonable person. That self-talk takes us back to the immaturity of our childhood when we were taught that we did not know what we felt or that it did not matter.
We do know what we feel, or we can learn to feel it. Denying that it matters will do nothing for us except to make us a "Queen of Denial," which is not just a river in Egypt.
Marjorie
To read more about truth-telling, see some earlier posts on my "Finding the Faith Way" blog. Click on these titles:
Things Mama Taught Me: Tell the Truth
To Thine Own Self Be True
Crossing the Bridge
(Sobbing) I'm not a crybaby!
My oatmeal tastes nasty.
"It's not nasty. Eat it," the parent warns.
"You'll hardly feel it," the doctor says.
Oww-oww—before the shot, oww-oww-oww—afterwards.
Some of us learned early that our emotions and sensory experiences were not acceptable to those around us. We learned that, by all indications, they cannot be trusted.
We were wrong.
So now we say, "Problem? There's not a problem," to avoid a confrontation.
I am so mad I could spit nails.
"Of course I'll help with your garage sale," we agree.
I really don't want to. Why did I say "yes"?
"It's okay. I don't mind," as friend or family member oversteps the boundary. I guess I've got to be okay with this if I want to be a good daughter / wife / mother / Christian.
And we are still wrong. We are keeping stuffed deep inside ourselves our feelings, our opinions, our instincts. This makes us, to some degree, inauthentic in our interaction with others. More dangerously, however, it creates a duplicity in our own thinking. Eventually, this will either erupt in anger and open damage to our relationships, or it will blunt our perception and cause us to abandon our personal selves. We tell ourselves over and over again, "This doesn't really matter," when it does matter, or "I shouldn't let this bother me," when it would bother any reasonable person. That self-talk takes us back to the immaturity of our childhood when we were taught that we did not know what we felt or that it did not matter.
We do know what we feel, or we can learn to feel it. Denying that it matters will do nothing for us except to make us a "Queen of Denial," which is not just a river in Egypt.
Marjorie
To read more about truth-telling, see some earlier posts on my "Finding the Faith Way" blog. Click on these titles:
Things Mama Taught Me: Tell the Truth
To Thine Own Self Be True
Crossing the Bridge
Friday, June 19, 2009
The Anatomy of Excess
What if ordinary excesses—not illegal stuff, but things like too much food, too much TV, too much shopping, too much weightless reading—are not so much the result of a selfish, undisciplined spirit and more the consequence of not giving oneself the necessary healthful care?
What if the failures we have seen high-profile leaders make in their personal lives did not announce to the world, "I was so weak; shame on me," but tell us that they did not heed their internal defense system which attempted, early on, to warn them about finding helpful ways to relieve stress and manage the demands made upon them?
What if the people we would criticize for their inconsistent application of "recovery" steps—whether of Alcoholics Anonymous, drug rehab, or anger management regimens—are struggling not just with a habit but with a numbing gridlock of the mind, an addiction begun because there seemed to be no way to cope with the life they faced?
What if we could convince the suicidal person, long before that act of ultimate excess, that the redemptive declaration is valid, "While there's life, there's hope."
What if we could learn to care properly for this vulnerable body and breakable spirit?
Just wondering . . .
Marjorie
What if the failures we have seen high-profile leaders make in their personal lives did not announce to the world, "I was so weak; shame on me," but tell us that they did not heed their internal defense system which attempted, early on, to warn them about finding helpful ways to relieve stress and manage the demands made upon them?
What if the people we would criticize for their inconsistent application of "recovery" steps—whether of Alcoholics Anonymous, drug rehab, or anger management regimens—are struggling not just with a habit but with a numbing gridlock of the mind, an addiction begun because there seemed to be no way to cope with the life they faced?
What if we could convince the suicidal person, long before that act of ultimate excess, that the redemptive declaration is valid, "While there's life, there's hope."
What if we could learn to care properly for this vulnerable body and breakable spirit?
Just wondering . . .
Marjorie
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Questions Are Okay
We don't always use balanced examples from Scripture when we are deciding how to order our lives as Christians. Take those Corinthian women who were forbidden to speak in the church . . . Paul writes to the church there, "Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law. And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church." Those verses are I Corinthians 14: 34, 35 which I quoted from the King James Version of the Holy Bible, because that four-hundred-year-old version is where I first learned the so-called "place of women in the church." And silencing the voice of women is an idea still clung to by many folks today.
But let's look at another example:
I am struck by the fact that this wealthy and wise king—although his personal life was not well-ordered—permitted questioning by a foreign, "heathen" woman. Perhaps she asked about the things that amaze us as well. "Why do plants turn to the sun?" "Why do birds sing while donkeys bray?" "How is life created in a mother's womb?" She opened her heart to him, so she may have asked, "Why does Israel not have a queen?" "How should my kingdom meet the needs of the poor?" "Why do you worship your particular god?" Nothing was too hard for him to answer, and apparently nothing was too incidental either. True, this did not occur in a church setting, but it was, after all, in the court of the wisest of all men; God said there had not been anyone like him before nor would there ever be.
So I'm thinking that a woman's questions are legitimate. The Corinthian women lived in a Greek culture where "public women" were disreputable. For a woman to speak out would indicate she was shamelessly bold. No such prohibition is given for any of the other churches for whom there are letters in the New Testament, but only to Corinth and to Ephesus where Timothy was located. If a woman finds herself in a situation where speaking up would discount her testimony, then maybe she will want to keep her thoughts to herself. But otherwise . . .
Questions are okay.
Marjorie
Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.
But let's look at another example:
"God gave Solomon wisdom—the deepest of understanding and the largest of hearts. There was nothing beyond him, nothing he couldn't handle. Solomon's wisdom outclassed the vaunted wisdom of wise men of the East, outshone the famous wisdom of Egypt. He was wiser than anyone . . . He created 3,000 proverbs; his songs added up to 1,005. He knew all about plants, from the huge cedar that grows in Lebanon to the tiny hyssop that grows in the cracks of a wall. He understood everything about animals and birds, reptiles and fish. Sent by kings from all over the earth who had heard of his reputation, people came from far and near to listen to the wisdom of Solomon." (I Kings 4:29-34)
"The queen of Sheba heard about Solomon and his connection with the Name of God. She came to put his reputation to the test by asking tough questions. She made a grand and showy entrance into Jerusalem—camels loaded with spices, a huge amount of gold, and precious gems. She came to Solomon and talked about all the things that she cared about, emptying her heart to him. Solomon answered everything she put to him—nothing stumped him. When the queen of Sheba experienced for herself Solomon's wisdom and saw with her own eyes the palace he had built, the meals that were served, the impressive array of court officials and sharply dressed waiters, the lavish crystal, and the elaborate worship extravagant with Whole-Burnt-Offerings at the steps leading up to The Temple of God, it took her breath away.
"She said to the king, 'It's all true! Your reputation for accomplishment and wisdom that reached all the way to my country is confirmed. I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it for myself; they didn't exaggerate! Such wisdom and elegance—far more than I could ever have imagined. Lucky the men and women who work for you, getting to be around you every day and hear your wise words firsthand! And blessed be God, your God, who took such a liking to you and made you king. Clearly, God's love for Israel is behind this, making you king to keep a just order and nurture a God-pleasing people.' " (I Kings 10:1-9)
I am struck by the fact that this wealthy and wise king—although his personal life was not well-ordered—permitted questioning by a foreign, "heathen" woman. Perhaps she asked about the things that amaze us as well. "Why do plants turn to the sun?" "Why do birds sing while donkeys bray?" "How is life created in a mother's womb?" She opened her heart to him, so she may have asked, "Why does Israel not have a queen?" "How should my kingdom meet the needs of the poor?" "Why do you worship your particular god?" Nothing was too hard for him to answer, and apparently nothing was too incidental either. True, this did not occur in a church setting, but it was, after all, in the court of the wisest of all men; God said there had not been anyone like him before nor would there ever be.
So I'm thinking that a woman's questions are legitimate. The Corinthian women lived in a Greek culture where "public women" were disreputable. For a woman to speak out would indicate she was shamelessly bold. No such prohibition is given for any of the other churches for whom there are letters in the New Testament, but only to Corinth and to Ephesus where Timothy was located. If a woman finds herself in a situation where speaking up would discount her testimony, then maybe she will want to keep her thoughts to herself. But otherwise . . .
Questions are okay.
Marjorie
Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.
Friday, June 12, 2009
The Mind of Christ
In my experience as a Christian, I have often heard the Scripture quoted, "We have the mind of Christ," and unfortunately, sometimes that was interpreted as though it read, "What I think is the way Jesus would think." This statement was then used as the compelling reason to require cooperation, obedience, or specifically for women and children, "submission."
The meaning of this verse is clearer in its context and in a modern translation: "Isaiah's question, 'Is there anyone around who knows God's Spirit, anyone who knows what he is doing?' has been answered: Christ knows, and we have Christ's Spirit." (I Corinthians 2:16 MSG, emphasis mine) To have "the mind of Christ" is to make God's priorities our own and to seek the fulfillment of His purposes. "Thy Kingdom come; Thy will be done."
"Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus . . . " Does that sound like one person making demands of another to conform to his/her wishes? Does that seem to prescribe a hierarchy of importance and value? The mind of Christ is expressed in humility and the heart of a servant: "You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross." (Philippians 2:5-8 NLT)
Charles Sheldon, the Topeka pastor who wrote "In His Steps" over a hundred years ago, challenged his congregation to follow Jesus as a moral example. The resurgence in the 90's of "W.W.J.D." led many to give thoughtful consideration to Christian behavior—a very good thing—but it is a mistake to think that clear direction will come with trying to figure out what He would do if He were here in the twenty-first century. Why should we not just get right to the heart of the matter: What is Jesus saying to me and through me now? How is Jesus in me wanting to act?
Seeking the mind of Christ for oneself does not imply that there will be no corporate guidelines for Christian behavior. Families have rules; churches and other organizations have regulations. But to claim the authority of Jesus Christ over others without having His attitude is presumptuous, inconsiderate, and dangerous.
Marjorie
You might like to read some further thoughts on "hierarchy", posted in my "Finding the Faith Way" blog. Click here.
Scripture marked MSG is taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. Scripture quotation marked NLT is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.
The meaning of this verse is clearer in its context and in a modern translation: "Isaiah's question, 'Is there anyone around who knows God's Spirit, anyone who knows what he is doing?' has been answered: Christ knows, and we have Christ's Spirit." (I Corinthians 2:16 MSG, emphasis mine) To have "the mind of Christ" is to make God's priorities our own and to seek the fulfillment of His purposes. "Thy Kingdom come; Thy will be done."
"Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus . . . " Does that sound like one person making demands of another to conform to his/her wishes? Does that seem to prescribe a hierarchy of importance and value? The mind of Christ is expressed in humility and the heart of a servant: "You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross." (Philippians 2:5-8 NLT)
Charles Sheldon, the Topeka pastor who wrote "In His Steps" over a hundred years ago, challenged his congregation to follow Jesus as a moral example. The resurgence in the 90's of "W.W.J.D." led many to give thoughtful consideration to Christian behavior—a very good thing—but it is a mistake to think that clear direction will come with trying to figure out what He would do if He were here in the twenty-first century. Why should we not just get right to the heart of the matter: What is Jesus saying to me and through me now? How is Jesus in me wanting to act?
Seeking the mind of Christ for oneself does not imply that there will be no corporate guidelines for Christian behavior. Families have rules; churches and other organizations have regulations. But to claim the authority of Jesus Christ over others without having His attitude is presumptuous, inconsiderate, and dangerous.
Marjorie
You might like to read some further thoughts on "hierarchy", posted in my "Finding the Faith Way" blog. Click here.
Scripture marked MSG is taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. Scripture quotation marked NLT is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Roses, and Some Women I Know
A disclaimer: I am not a rosarian! I do have an area beside my home that I lovingly call "a rose garden," so I have been reading about different kinds of roses and their culture. Among my friends, I find some similarities to these wonderful flowers.
Greenhouse plants are cultivated for their singular beauty. There will not be a lot of flowers, maybe only one, but it will be "perfect." On the other hand, some garden climbers bloom so profusely that the trellis or fence supporting them is covered with roses and the ground beneath has been showered with petals. They are smaller flowers, true, and not so delicately formed, but the lavish display makes up for that difference.
To satisfy the American taste for what is big and bright, flower breeders have produced new strains of roses that have giant, long-lasting flowers in stunning colors. Along the way, though, most of the fragrance has been inadvertently bred out of some of those specimens. Many mass-produced roses have no detectable scent at all. Some of the garden-grown ones, however, are so sweet that one cut bloom can make a whole room fragrant.
If roses are obtained from a florist, they were probably cut before they were in full bloom, perhaps still only buds. The thorns will have been removed, and the stems tended carefully so that the flowers stay beautiful for several days inside one's home. Roses in the garden may not last as long, exposed as they are to the elements, pests, and disease. Some buds get damaged and never form a full flower. They have kept their thorns, however, to protect themselves from children and dogs, and many kinds bloom again and again throughout the season to please the rose-lover.
Need I explain the analogies? It's enough, I think, to say that all kinds of roses are lovely. And women whose experiences differ greatly and whose lives have not all been formed in the same way are equally lovely and valuable.
Marjorie
Greenhouse plants are cultivated for their singular beauty. There will not be a lot of flowers, maybe only one, but it will be "perfect." On the other hand, some garden climbers bloom so profusely that the trellis or fence supporting them is covered with roses and the ground beneath has been showered with petals. They are smaller flowers, true, and not so delicately formed, but the lavish display makes up for that difference.
To satisfy the American taste for what is big and bright, flower breeders have produced new strains of roses that have giant, long-lasting flowers in stunning colors. Along the way, though, most of the fragrance has been inadvertently bred out of some of those specimens. Many mass-produced roses have no detectable scent at all. Some of the garden-grown ones, however, are so sweet that one cut bloom can make a whole room fragrant.
If roses are obtained from a florist, they were probably cut before they were in full bloom, perhaps still only buds. The thorns will have been removed, and the stems tended carefully so that the flowers stay beautiful for several days inside one's home. Roses in the garden may not last as long, exposed as they are to the elements, pests, and disease. Some buds get damaged and never form a full flower. They have kept their thorns, however, to protect themselves from children and dogs, and many kinds bloom again and again throughout the season to please the rose-lover.
Need I explain the analogies? It's enough, I think, to say that all kinds of roses are lovely. And women whose experiences differ greatly and whose lives have not all been formed in the same way are equally lovely and valuable.
Marjorie
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
"We Are Pro-Body"
I recently saw a billboard ad for a local health center stating, “We are pro-body.” I have to assume that means, “We want to help you make your body the best it can be.”
My growing-up years carried a lot of anti-body messages—no, not antibodies of the kind that help rid us of viruses by attacking them before we become ill, but “anti-you-have-a-body.” My father was physical; his work demanded strength and stamina. My brothers were expected to be physical: doing farm chores, riding bikes, playing softball. While I was not forbidden to participate in these activates, how well could I to do them in a dress? Some activities were forbidden by my parents and/or by the Church: dancing, roller skating (at a rink), and swimming in a group of both boys and girls.
Looking back, and seeking to be charitable, I think my parents and the church may not have intended to teach a dualistic theology of mind versus body. "Mind = good. Body = bad." The Scripture teaches clearly that "flesh" and "spirit" oppose one another and in fact are warring within the individual believer. But flesh, in this instance, does not mean the same as body, but rather is unredeemed human nature with its inborn tendency to be wholly selfish. "The mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God [which is love, remember] for it is not even able to do so, and those who are in the flesh [living out their selfish, unloving nature] cannot please God. (Romans 8:7, 8 NASB)
Sadly, I think this teaching was misunderstood to mean that the body is not acceptable—not to God and not to us if we want to please Him. Again, probably none of those who gave me religious instruction would have espoused that teaching. Did I just get it wrong? I don't think so, for it was demonstrated pretty clearly in daily life. Specifically, there seemed to be something basically wrong with being in a female body. My mother hid herself (and me) in clothing which had the chief attribute of shapelessness. My father warned me that girls were responsible for the moral behavior of their dates, and a tent revivalist told us in the crudest of terms that we women, with our irresistible but wicked charms, were responsible for men going to hell. Is it any wonder that I had trouble claiming my body?
Although the physical body is only temporary, God thinks it's important. He could have used any means at all to form the ultimate revelation of Himself to humankind. And what did He choose? A human body. Would God have given Christ a body in which to live on earth if He thought bodies were a bad idea? In spite of the senses and appetites which sometimes get us into difficulty, God used a body to hold Himself. And He still does. He is pro-body.
Marjorie
Scripture is from the New American Standard Bible, used by permission of http://www.lockman.org/
My growing-up years carried a lot of anti-body messages—no, not antibodies of the kind that help rid us of viruses by attacking them before we become ill, but “anti-you-have-a-body.” My father was physical; his work demanded strength and stamina. My brothers were expected to be physical: doing farm chores, riding bikes, playing softball. While I was not forbidden to participate in these activates, how well could I to do them in a dress? Some activities were forbidden by my parents and/or by the Church: dancing, roller skating (at a rink), and swimming in a group of both boys and girls.
Looking back, and seeking to be charitable, I think my parents and the church may not have intended to teach a dualistic theology of mind versus body. "Mind = good. Body = bad." The Scripture teaches clearly that "flesh" and "spirit" oppose one another and in fact are warring within the individual believer. But flesh, in this instance, does not mean the same as body, but rather is unredeemed human nature with its inborn tendency to be wholly selfish. "The mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God [which is love, remember] for it is not even able to do so, and those who are in the flesh [living out their selfish, unloving nature] cannot please God. (Romans 8:7, 8 NASB)
Sadly, I think this teaching was misunderstood to mean that the body is not acceptable—not to God and not to us if we want to please Him. Again, probably none of those who gave me religious instruction would have espoused that teaching. Did I just get it wrong? I don't think so, for it was demonstrated pretty clearly in daily life. Specifically, there seemed to be something basically wrong with being in a female body. My mother hid herself (and me) in clothing which had the chief attribute of shapelessness. My father warned me that girls were responsible for the moral behavior of their dates, and a tent revivalist told us in the crudest of terms that we women, with our irresistible but wicked charms, were responsible for men going to hell. Is it any wonder that I had trouble claiming my body?
Although the physical body is only temporary, God thinks it's important. He could have used any means at all to form the ultimate revelation of Himself to humankind. And what did He choose? A human body. Would God have given Christ a body in which to live on earth if He thought bodies were a bad idea? In spite of the senses and appetites which sometimes get us into difficulty, God used a body to hold Himself. And He still does. He is pro-body.
Marjorie
Scripture is from the New American Standard Bible, used by permission of http://www.lockman.org/
Friday, June 5, 2009
Take Care of the Tools
When I stopped living in apartments and had my own little house, I took a great interest for the first time in yard and garden. I planted a number of trees and bushes, put in a square-foot garden, and laid out a strawberry patch. I had never owned tools before, but as the need arose, I purchased them so that eventually I had a basic collection. (No, I don't borrow, but I don't loan either!) A favorite uncle who lived right next door impressed upon me, by his example, how important it was to take care of the tools. I still clean and oil them after each use; consequently, my hoes and shovels and rakes are not rusty even though they're well-used. The bonus: they are always ready for use when I need them!
I haven't always, though, taken care of my most important tools—the physical framework in which I live—and sometimes I still don't do a very good job. There are times when a greater good calls for sacrifice on our part, so what I say here is not a criticism of attention to our duty or decision. It is intended to remind us to care for the "tools" that are irreplaceable, intended to last for our lifetime. All we can do is the best we can.
Young mothers, especially if you are also working and/or going to school—Do the best you can. The very recognition that you actually need adult conversation, the freedom to read either "mind candy" or a challenging book, a "Y" membership or a pot of tulips in the kitchen will be freeing. Breadwinners, either men or women, whose work is demanding or whose job search is frustrating—Do what you have to do. But expect and plan for the time when there will be a little relief, not just retirement down the road, but an hour here or there to call your own. Meanwhile, have that checkup! Wear that seat belt! Eat those vegetables! Walk those extra steps!
Just a little investment now pays big dividends later. That goes for shovels and rakes—and for bodies.
Marjorie
I haven't always, though, taken care of my most important tools—the physical framework in which I live—and sometimes I still don't do a very good job. There are times when a greater good calls for sacrifice on our part, so what I say here is not a criticism of attention to our duty or decision. It is intended to remind us to care for the "tools" that are irreplaceable, intended to last for our lifetime. All we can do is the best we can.
Young mothers, especially if you are also working and/or going to school—Do the best you can. The very recognition that you actually need adult conversation, the freedom to read either "mind candy" or a challenging book, a "Y" membership or a pot of tulips in the kitchen will be freeing. Breadwinners, either men or women, whose work is demanding or whose job search is frustrating—Do what you have to do. But expect and plan for the time when there will be a little relief, not just retirement down the road, but an hour here or there to call your own. Meanwhile, have that checkup! Wear that seat belt! Eat those vegetables! Walk those extra steps!
Just a little investment now pays big dividends later. That goes for shovels and rakes—and for bodies.
Marjorie
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
"I Deserve . . ."
"I deserve . . ." are words that I can hardly bring myself to say. During the years of my youth, it was firmly instilled in me that life doesn't owe me anything. Later, spiritual trainers taught me that "Christians have no rights." Consequently, I arrived at adulthood believing that the appropriate thing to do was treat myself poorly. The result was unhealthful eating habits, too few hours of sleep, no time for exercise, and unrewarding relationships.
The time came finally when I began to realize that this was not the way God intended for me to live. I was able to say, albeit with wavering conviction, "I deserve better . . .", although I didn't really know how to get that. I am now learning that it is, as with so many things, a matter of balance. No, we cannot just "float," believing that everything will somehow work out and what we need will be provided by our family or the Church or the government. At the other extreme, we should not equate poor and rejected with "holy."
Reading of Jesus' life, we see that He stopped to eat, He stopped to rest, and He stopped to pray. (Walking everywhere, He did not have to be concerned about getting exercise!) But Jesus did not lose awareness of other people while He tended to His own needs. He did not shut others out, but sometimes laid aside His own justifiable agenda in order to minister to them. He was a master of balance.
Did Jesus exercise "His rights"? I think so. He was the Son of God, and sometimes He claimed that Divine authority and used that power. He was also son of man, so He celebrated at the Cana wedding, He wept at Lazarus' tomb, and He became angry at the merchants in the Temple. The details of Jesus' death show clearly that His "human rights" were violated, but throughout His life, Jesus claimed His right to act like a human. Again, He had mastered the art of balance.
By advocating "I deserve. . .", I am not suggesting that we become selfish or that we abdicate our responsibilities. I am becoming more and more aware of the rhythms of life. There are seasons when we are just too busy. Small children consume our time and energy, or there is an ill or frail family member to whom we give care. We struggle through the double-time march of job and schooling. The state of the family finances means having to work longer or differently than we expected. A relationship requires our special nurturing for a time. A period of demanding work in our career takes extra attention. But when that season is over, what then?
Sometimes we continue, after it is no longer mandated, the lifestyle we developed through necessity. We eat on the run, sleep too little, watch too much TV because we're so tired we can't read, and give little consideration to the things that bring beauty and peace and meaning to life. We "deserve" these things, not because we are somebody better than those around us, but because you and I are "one of the least of Jesus' brethren" too.
Marjorie
The time came finally when I began to realize that this was not the way God intended for me to live. I was able to say, albeit with wavering conviction, "I deserve better . . .", although I didn't really know how to get that. I am now learning that it is, as with so many things, a matter of balance. No, we cannot just "float," believing that everything will somehow work out and what we need will be provided by our family or the Church or the government. At the other extreme, we should not equate poor and rejected with "holy."
Reading of Jesus' life, we see that He stopped to eat, He stopped to rest, and He stopped to pray. (Walking everywhere, He did not have to be concerned about getting exercise!) But Jesus did not lose awareness of other people while He tended to His own needs. He did not shut others out, but sometimes laid aside His own justifiable agenda in order to minister to them. He was a master of balance.
Did Jesus exercise "His rights"? I think so. He was the Son of God, and sometimes He claimed that Divine authority and used that power. He was also son of man, so He celebrated at the Cana wedding, He wept at Lazarus' tomb, and He became angry at the merchants in the Temple. The details of Jesus' death show clearly that His "human rights" were violated, but throughout His life, Jesus claimed His right to act like a human. Again, He had mastered the art of balance.
By advocating "I deserve. . .", I am not suggesting that we become selfish or that we abdicate our responsibilities. I am becoming more and more aware of the rhythms of life. There are seasons when we are just too busy. Small children consume our time and energy, or there is an ill or frail family member to whom we give care. We struggle through the double-time march of job and schooling. The state of the family finances means having to work longer or differently than we expected. A relationship requires our special nurturing for a time. A period of demanding work in our career takes extra attention. But when that season is over, what then?
Sometimes we continue, after it is no longer mandated, the lifestyle we developed through necessity. We eat on the run, sleep too little, watch too much TV because we're so tired we can't read, and give little consideration to the things that bring beauty and peace and meaning to life. We "deserve" these things, not because we are somebody better than those around us, but because you and I are "one of the least of Jesus' brethren" too.
Marjorie
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