A Little Bit Mad

Carefully, carefully, I'm going to write today about staying a little bit mad. I don't want you to misunderstand me and think that I am advocating living in a state of angry agitation. By using "mad" instead of "angry," although it's non-standard English, perhaps you will better understand my intent. One can be a little bit mad, I think, and not be furious, full of rage, and—dare I say it?—without sinning. I propose that to our own advantage, sometimes we need to stay a little bit mad.

When we have been mistreated, we need at some point, to let go of the need to retaliate. That is the Christian thing to do, and the healthy thing to do. Some would teach us that when you have truly forgiven an offense, you should also forget it. You may. But again, you may not. You may stay a little bit mad.

Some experiences are not easily forgotten, and indeed should not be, for we then proceed with a sense of caution that we did not have before. Some injuries propel us into advocacy for others who suffer similar indignities. Some show us where we have allowed others to take advantage of us. Some teach us that, following great personal harm, we can regain our balance and discover, "There is life after—" whatever.

I would never recommend to you the "mad" that is constantly simmering, that keeps you fearful or self-pitying, and that disturbs the peace of God that is to rule in our hearts. But that little bit of mad can be the energy that causes you to focus on what is good and right in your relationships. Without the determination that comes with a little "mad," it is easy to avoid the growth that is needed to become a whole and healthy Christian woman.

Marjorie