"My Bad"

Matt was accused of creating the problems in his domestic life, and right or wrong, he accepted the blame. Doing so, made him look like a bad person. But I know Matt, and I know he is not a bad person. So that caused me to start pondering—"Are blame for doing a bad thing and being bad really the same thing? Why do we mix them up?"

I grew up thinking they were much the same. Back then, if someone said, "It's your fault," I took that to mean, "Then you are a bad person." We had not yet come to saying as in today's vernacular, "My bad," meaning "I did something wrong, or foolish, or just by mistake." This admission does not carry the sense that I believe that I am a bad person or that you will think I am. And that is quite a good thing.

Good people and well-meaning people sometimes do bad things. Abraham lied, twice, about his relationship to his wife beautiful Sarah, pitting her at risk. King David dallied with a female subject and subsequently planned the murder of her husband. Peter adamantly refused to extend the Gospel past his own ethnicity. Paul's confessed that he, with his impeccable heritage, was the worst of all sinners.

These same individuals, repentant and redeemed, were not bad people. Abraham was known as a friend of God, and David was called a man after God's own heart. Peter accepted the Divine instruction that the Gospel was for Gentiles also. Paul declared at life's end, "I have kept the faith, and there's a crown for me." Obviously, admitting that "Yes, I am a sinner; yes, I have behaved like a sinner" does not make a person beyond the reach of grace.

A trick that Satan is fond of sung on Christians: the belief that they are irretrievably bad. Standing up to our responsibility, admitting "my bad," is very different from defeatedly bowing under constant blame heaped on by the devil or by unhappy people or even by our own hopeful selves. Instead, "I am overwhelmed with joy in the LORD my God! For he has dressed me with the clothing of salvation and draped me in a robe of righteousness. I am like a bridegroom in his wedding suit or a bride with her jewels." (Isaiah 61:10)

What an exchange! My "badness" or fearful sense of "badness" for His goodness!

Marjorie

Scripture quotation taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Phantom Pain

Surgeons have known for a long time about phantom pain. Phantom limb syndrome was first described in 1552 by French surgeon Ambroise Paré, who operated on wounded soldiers and wrote about patients who complained of pain in amputated limbs. Even that long ago, he thought, as doctors do today, that the pain originated in the brain, which is contrary to the popular misconception that phantom pain is in the sensory nerve endings.

Other kinds of trauma also may produce an aftereffect something like the pain that seems to come from the body part that isn't there. A very frightening experience such as living through a destructive earthquake or tornado may cause recurring fear; if a heavy truck makes the house shake as it rumbles by, the person has an instinctive response of panic. A survivor of a terrible accident may relive over and over again the awful moments when they were trapped inside their burning car. Even when she can clearly see that the event is not happening again, the impression on mind and body is as real as if it were.

Women who have suffered emotional devastation—rape, battering, emotional abuse, abandonment by the one they trusted, impoverishment—may feel recurrent pain even if their ordeal ends. Is that so strange? A thoughtless person might say of this lingering pain, "Well, it's just all in her head," and technically, that would be correct. This pain, too, emanates from the brain, but it is as real as that which seems to come from a limb that is no longer attached to the body. She may, for a very long time, think of the one who so deeply hurt her as if he's only in the next room. The pain and uncertainty and fear are as real as they ever were.

Researchers are working on treatment for pain from phantom limbs. There is help for persons suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder (the suffering after shattering events). And release can eventually come after the pain of emotional trauma too, from a number of sources. A woman can speak to herself, "It's over. I am safe now." Loving friends can reassure her. Mental health professionals know how to help. With all of these, we still acknowledge that God is the ultimate Healer. Even Paré himself said, "I dressed his wound, God healed him."

Jesus declared, "The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor." (Luke 4:17-19)

Marjorie

You may also like "Getting Over It" here.

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.
Info about phantom pain and treatment from http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2007/01/070118-phantom-limb.html

"Yes, I Hear You"

I am writing today to women who are suffering great hardship. You have cried and prayed, but no answer has come. Yet.

You may have a son or daughter who has left home to pursue a life of excess; you may not even know where he or she is. You may have been deserted by the companion who promised to cherish you. Or perhaps you are being abused—physically, verbally, or emotionally—or you are witnessing the abuse of those you love. Your family might be among the many who have lost jobs, homes, and dignity. You may be facing devastating illness in your own or a loved one's life. Your heart may be broken by the death of someone very dear. You may have a past that haunts you.

In the book of Exodus, in the telling of a single story, God declares three times that He knows what is happening. The children of Israel, after the years of Joseph's favor with the king, were enslaved in Egypt. "Years passed, and the king of Egypt died. But the Israelites continued to groan under their burden of slavery. They cried out for help, and their cry rose up to God.
4 God heard their groaning,
4 and he remembered his covenant promise to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.
4 He looked down on the people of Israel
4 and knew it was time to act. (Exodus 2:23-25)

Then the Lord told him [Moses],
4 “I have certainly seen the oppression of my people in Egypt.
4 I have heard their cries of distress because of their harsh slave drivers.
4 Yes, I am aware of their suffering.
4 So I have come down to rescue them from the power of the Egyptians
4 and lead them out of Egypt into their own fertile and spacious land . . . Look!
4 The cry of the people of Israel has reached me,
4 and I have seen how harshly the Egyptians abuse them. Now go, for
4 I am sending you to Pharaoh. You must lead my people Israel out of Egypt.” (Exodus 3:7-10)

Now go and call together all the elders of Israel. Tell them, "The Lord, the God of your ancestors—the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob—has appeared to me. He told me,
4 'I have been watching closely, and
4 I see how the Egyptians are treating you.
4 I have promised to rescue you from your oppression in Egypt.
4 I will lead you to a land flowing with milk and honey. . . ' " (Exodus 3:16, 17)

I cannot promise that your prodigal child will soon come home in repentance or that your husband will return or your abuser will die. I cannot say that money will suddenly appear, as if by magic. I cannot assure you that you or your loved one will recover from the illness that is draining away life itself. I cannot say that after your loss things will soon be "normal" again. I cannot promise that your sorrowful regrets will just go away.

But this I do know and can assure you: God has heard your cries of distress. He is aware of your suffering. He has been watching closely and when the time is right, He will come to rescue you.

Rescue did not happen overnight for the Israelites, and it did not even happen in a way that they relished so much! But God kept His covenant promise with them, and He will keep it with you too. The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them." (Psalm 91:14, 15)

Does Jesus care when my heart is pained
Too deeply for mirth or song,
As the burdens press, and the cares distress,
And the way grows weary and long?

Does Jesus care when my way is dark
With a nameless dread and fear?
As the daylight fades into deep night shades,
Does He care enough to be near?

Does Jesus care when I’ve said “goodbye”
To the dearest on earth to me,
And my sad heart aches till it nearly breaks—
Is it aught to Him? Does He see?

Refrain:
Oh, yes, He cares, I know He cares,
His heart is touched with my grief;
When the days are weary, the long nights dreary,
I know my Savior cares.

--Frank E. Graeff, 1901

Marjorie

Scripture quotations are taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.
Words of "Does Jesus Care?" from http://library.timelesstruths.org/music/Does_Jesus_Care/

What Happens When Women Worry

Today I came across an old book that I have had for a long time. Over thirty years ago, a Christian woman wrote, "What Happens When Women Pray"—not a question, but a statement. It has gone into many editions; there are over two million in print. She outlines some of the basic concepts of prayer and how God answers. Seeing the title again brought to mind an opposing thought: what happens when women worry.
Living in a constant state of worry can trigger a host of physical reactions. In long-ago times, the "fight or flight" response protected our ancestors from wild animals and unfriendly humans. In ordinary, daily life we don't face those dangers, but our body doesn't know that. When subjected to continued intense anxiety, it prepares for a genuine threat. The nervous system releases stress hormones to boost the body's fuel levels—but if the constant inrush of fuel is not needed for physical activity like fighting or running away (or used in purposeful exercise), it can create health problems.

The fast heartbeat, dry mouth, trembling or weakness that one may experience after a scare can become commonplace to the chronic worrier. Dizziness, muscle tension and aches, shortness of breath or difficulty swallowing, headaches, and nausea may also occur. Eventually, there could be serious physical consequences including suppression of the immune system, digestive disorders, premature coronary artery disease, and heart attack.

Worry, some wise person has said, is a cycle of inefficient thought whirling around a center of fear. If you are a worrier, your doctor might suggest some lifestyle changes, telling you to exercise and to eat a healthful diet, cut down on caffeine and learn to relax—all of which can be very helpful. You might also consider dealing with those two things that constitute so much of our worry: inefficient thought and fear.

How about sitting down to give careful thought to the worrisome situation:
4First, is it my responsibility?
4Am I able to do anything about it?
4Will anything change if I continue to fret?
4On the contrary, what might possibly happen if I pray?

And then consider that pivotal fear:
4Is the perceived danger present and real?
4What is likely to happen if I take action based on my feeling of fear?
4But what could happen if I act on my knowledge that God is bigger than anything?

What happens when women worry? Not much that is helpful. But perhaps they eventually see Jesus' truth. "If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things [what to eat and what to wear], but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes." (Matthew 6:30-34 MSG)

Marjorie

Physiological information from http://www.webmd.com/balance/how-worrying-affects-your-body Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.